I’m a neurotic, and I’m obsessive, so for me to not file my taxes is a rare occurrence. So rare, in fact, that when I got a letter saying the IRS was holding my refund due to one filing in a previous year, I was flabbergasted. I thought ‘Oh, this must be because I didn’t file when I was in college, since I didn’t have a paying job!’ I’d had summer jobs, and I always filed those.

They sent a pretty vague letter ‘Hi, no money for you! You didn’t file!’ but they didn’t say what year (which if you ask me is stupid) and gave me a number to call. it was busy. I kept calling for a while and finally called the main IRS ‘Help, where’s my refund!?’ number and talked to a nice lady.

It wasn’t Mrs. Landingham, but she was nice all the same. Asked me my name, my social, my address, Ipstenit’s name, her social, and my birthday. Deciding it was me, she asked how much I was due back and looked it up. Now, I already knew what was up, but I understand she had to play her game.

She tells me I have a hold on my payment because I didn’t file. Okay, when? 2001 she says. So I dig out my W2, expecting to find the 2 you have left over after filing and … nope. All four. Son of a bitch.

I tell her she’s right! I’m horrified! What should I do?!

She says to go online and print up the 2001 forms and mail them in. But I have to do it by April 17th if I want to get a refund (if applicable). Right then and there, once we hang up, I fill out my taxes and find out the IRS owes me $100! Not too bad. So I fill it out and think that I probably didn’t do my state taxes either. They owe me $0.03…

Yeah. Three flippin cents.

I told them to give it to breast cancer awareness and sent the set of forms in.

It’s funny, in a weird way, to learn that I did forget and the IRS caught it. But Illinois may be surprised. Of course, they do a better job at figuring my taxes.