The Very Secret Diary of Nicky
Grissom gave Sara own case! SARA! Am much more manly than Sara. Well, maybe Cat. Sara v. manly for woman. Wore boots made for walking. But Sara got OWN case, alone. Can not tell if Grisssom v. happy or v. mad with Sara. Am v. jelous of Sara either way. Sara #1 on my list.
Warrick teased me about Sara. Joked I no longer love Liam. Warrick better not go after Liam. Will kill Warrick. Grissom mock me again in front of Warrick! Said I not attentive! Told us to check out murky waters. Warrick tricked me w/ Rock/Paper/Scissors. Made me strip to dive in pool. Fooled him! Only took off shirt! Had to walk around all night in wet, tight jeans. Warrick #1 on my list.
Warrick and I pretended to film porn. Warrick want me to play part of wife. Suspect Warrick trying to get in pants! Told Warrick I husband last time, am husband now. Pennance for the pool. Warrick refused to take off clothes or wear dress. Warrick still #1 on my list.
Spent rest of case in SubPlotSubBasement. Grissom #1 on my list. Maybe cute lab tech will share pictures of sexy AV guy or hot detective. Will kill anyone who touches Liam.
Grissom put mold on Liam’s feet! MY LIAM! Will kill Grissom. Cat had to have Brass sit on me to not kill Grissom. No one touches Liam. Grissom so #1 on my list!
Got into trouble calling those Hobbits ‘midgits.’ Grissom mocked me in front of Sara! Again! Suspect Grissom trying to look all manly/butch for Sara. Hah. Am much more manly that Grissom. Had sex with hooker! Hooker died, but that not my fault. Will whine to Liam later and ask for foot rub from cute Scandinavian boy. Grissom now #1 on list.
Solved case and Grissom not care. Grissom all mopey about not getting Liam or Sara. Why he think he get any with Liam? Sara want Grissom bad, so bad we all make jokes. Can Sara not see Grissom is Pervy LabRat fancier? Sara looking nice with makeup, maybe will invite Sara over for facials and toenail painting. Will hide Liam in closet so Sara not try and take Liam. Will tell Sara Grissom not like her like that. No, Sara would hit me. Better, will ask Warrick to tell her!
Grissom still #1 on my list.
The very secret diary of … Liam, the Lab Tech
Told Sara, again, I am Greg, not Liam. Do not look like Liam. Am much more buff. Nicky say I must stick up for myself more in lab. Not let Grissom walk all over me. Grissom makes eyes at me and Warrick all the time. Nicky always comes and takes Grissom away. Nicky so nice.
Nicky and Catherine work well togeather. Wonder if Nicky going to date Catherine. Warrick also likes Catherine. Heard Warrick got to touch Catherine’s ass. Go Warrick! Would like to touch Sara’s ass, but Sara might hit me. Sara in love with Grissom. Fool! Grissom loves no one but bugs. Stupid bug man. Does not know good thing when he sees it.
Would do Sara. Nicky always comes by when trying to make time with Sara, to ask me to ‘show him my lab results.’ Nicky always so sweet, helping me become better CSI. When BugDaddy put mold on feet, Nicky helped apply cure. Nicky held hair back when I ralphed at crime scene last year.
Everyone else worried about Nicky. Talking about his ‘list.’ Do not know what this ‘list’ is, but heard Grissom is #1 on list. V. concerned how Grissom/Nicky will make Sara feel. Maybe Sara need consoling from cute lab guy! Go me! Must get new haircut.